Thursday, October 29, 2009
At one point in time in my life I was a very lonely person. I was the type of person that would go straight home after school and crawl into my bed and pull the covers over my head and wish that I was in another place. A place where I wouldn't be afraid to show myself. A type of place where I wouldn't have to close myself off with the rest of the world.This was the place that I was longing to find. So after awhile I became Piggy.Piggy was my tendency to want to be shy and close myself off with the rest of the world. As I became more and more Piggy. I was hurting myself and the people around me that loved me and cared about me. I hurting myself by "sitting in front of the window and resting my head on my hand and watching life go by." Not living it like the rest of the world. My family was very concerned with me because they just wanted me to be to be happy and to be able to live my life and not just daze off and watch other people living there life. My friends where just as much concerned about me. They where worried about me because I didn't feel like associating with them anymore I just wanted to be by myself . At school if my friends and I passed each other in the hallway we would just pass each other and say "hey" and keep on going. At lunch time instead of associating with my friends, I would go to the library and study. Fear that I might have to communicate with other people. After school if I had a good day I would go home and watch TV. and ask myself why I was like this. Why I didn't want anybody to associate with me? I would wonder if it could because I got left in the middle of a family war. Wondering if it was because I would have to be the leverage for every fight that went on. Or could it be the fact that the person that didn't treat me like leverage and actual cared about me. Had a heart attack right there infornt of me and there was nothing that I could do about it. All I did was sit there and cry.
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I can totally relate to this blog. Mine is quite similar and I had many of the same problems as you faced. People don't bother to realize how some people don't like to associate much with others. There's nothing wrong with being introvertial. For some people, 'going to the mall' sounds more like 'spending the day in hell'. A lot of people don't understand that. Take some advice...if your friends aren't willing to accept that you like your alone time--then they shouldn't be your friends. People like that will only make you angrier and question your personality more, and there's nothing wrong with being an introvert. There's no shame in that. Take it from someone who knows.
ReplyDeleteBut, don't take it to the extreme. Being the way you are doesn't mean you have to isolate yourself. You're going to have to associate with others at some point, no matter how isolated your job is. There will always be someone. You don't have to change who you are. Try learning to chameleon. People won't bother you as much and you'll be able to live your life, the way you want to live it.
all i can say is...life is too short to sit their and watch other people! have some fun! get some people that have the same interest as you and go do some things yall both enjoy. try not to be shy. be outgoing!! more friends...more socially active you can be which means you can have more fun!!! :)
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